Natural...

This is natural, they say

It is all for the best

I cannot move past this heartache

This pain in my chest

Those days were surreal

Did this truly just occur

Happiness turned to sorrow

My life now a blur

This is natural, they say

I knew I was going to lose you

The most difficult emotion

There was nothing I could do

I am given no explanation

This is natural, they say

Were you pink or were you blue

My complexion is now grey

Trying to move on

A forward step everyday

I will always remember you

This is natural, they say

But the truth is,

it is not natural to one whom feels pain.

To feel such an emptiness inside, lonliness,

More like going insane.

I wake up every morning and see a mark

But not the image of you but a scar.

I shed hours and hours of tears in the dark

Pleading with God and saying “you’ve gone too far”

I know you are powerful and this too shall pass

But what about me…I know I didn’t fail your class.

Your class of motherhood, for you’ve blessed me twice

What exactly did I do wrong to have to pay this price?

“I would have loved with a love that was greater than a love” like-“Poe”

and believed that “Those who are faithful know only the trivial side of love: it is the faithless who know love’s tragedies” like “Oscar” But what I’m missing here is that I am not faithless. I know love and how to love and what is needed to protect those loved. But as I could carry on with questions forever thru my life the only one that I really need answered is…

Why didn’t you trust me with what is so “natural?”